Today seems to be a better day so far. My pain levels, while still fairly strong, are not as bad as the previous few days. I have a lot of work to do today. Almost all of it schoolwork to catch up on before the term is completely over. I have a lot of studying to do for my final next week as well. I have really missed far too much class this term, but damn it is hard to be at school when my body feels like it is being wrenched apart. There are times when my pain can be so bad that I gasp, groan or otherwise make some uncontrolled noise, and it is very difficult for me to be around strangers when I am in intense pain. And, being that this is the time of year when my pain is at its worst, it is also making going to school probably the most difficult it will be all year.
It is a little cold and gray outside, although there is a crown of sunlight on the hill just across the river. Probably about forty degrees outside. I just took a picture from my porch showing our yard and the river. I am planning on doing this on a daily basis. I saw a Great Blue Heron this morning flying by our bank. Such a big, majestic bird, although they are definitely the bullies of the river.
Julia just fell asleep in my arms. She has been doing that a lot lately. Nice to know that she feels safe and secure with Daddy.
I am more and more feeling like the sense of joy and happiness is starting to return to our house. I can look out at Pompey’s grave and not feel like I am going to burst into tears. Still sadness there, but not so much as to make everything gray and flat.
Well, that is all for now, mostly because JuJu is asleep in my left arm and typing one handed is a pain!